The Ungrateful Wretch
by Pickamandy
Summary: Rikku is by herself with no one to cling to. And guess what? She's mad. Aurikku R


I wrote this before I wrote "Dance with Me." I guess you could consider this a prequel, but it's still it's own little one-shot. R&R

I do not own Final Fantasy X or X-2, though if I did, I would have never let Auron die and He and Rikku would have lived happily ever after! *cough cough* Sorry about that! I just get a little frustrated that this pairing is purely fictional :( haha enjoy the fic!

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I know I should be happy for her, but I'm not. I should be over there with her laughing and rejoicing, but I'm not. I should be excited that my friend is back, but I'm not. Don't get me wrong. I'm glad that he's here, but I'm just a little jealous. Yuna has gotten all the glory and honor for defeating Sin. She didn't do it alone, ya know? She had help. My help. And Auron's. For a while, I thought that Yuna and I were in the same boat. We had both lost someone we loved. But when I saw Yuna and Tidus holding each other, I couldn't help but envy what they had. What I _had_, but have no more. It's frustrating, ya know? Seeing such a strong love right in front of my eyes. I mean, Wakka and Lulu are together! Who's next? Is Kimahri going to find some lady friend too?

It's like the Fayth are taunting me. They know that I would do anything to get Auron back. So they chose to tease me like this by giving the love I want and deserve to Yuna. To the girl that already has everything she could possibly want. I'm so mad that I could just break something! Why do I have to be treated like this? Why am I the only one left alone? Why is it that my heart is left bent and broken? It sucks. That's the only way I can put what I feel into words. It just flat out sucks. I love Yuna and all, she's my cousin for Pete's sake! I just don't think that I can be happy for her. Sure I'll go and smile and say how amazing it is that he's back and how wonderful it is to have him here. Don't worry, I'll say all the right crap in all the right places. I won't mess this up for Yunie. She's truly happy again.

I should be thankful, but I'm not. Wow, I'm such a crappy friend. Just because she has her love back and I don't doesn't mean that I can't be my normal cheerful self around her anymore. No, I have to go up to her and just lie to her face. Yep, I'm _such_ a good friend. But maybe there's hope? Maybe he will come back, just like Tidus? It's highly unlikely, but there's always a chance. I have to hold onto the hope that he will come back. Maybe this is just the start of _my_ story. Yeah, this is _my_ story and no one can decide what's going to happen. I will write it myself. He's gonna come back. He has to. He just has to. And when he does, I'm gonna grab him up in the biggest hug he's ever had. He'll just stand there looking down at me, waiting patiently for me to let go. And I'll stare up into his good eye, my face beaming, and lean up and whisper, "I missed you, Mr. Grumpy Gills."

But I've gotta face reality, the dead just don't come back to life. The old fart has long been dead, though I didn't know it then. No wonder he was so distant. Maybe that was his way of protecting me. So I wouldn't get hurt in the end. Well, Auron, you failed. Epically. Not only did I get hurt, I got destroyed. But that's not wholly his fault, I guess. There were subtle hints, ya know? I just never picked up on them until those pyreflies came floating out of him.

Why can't I just get him outta my head! It's just so frustrating! To think that a dead man has a hold on my heart... he could've stuck around for a little longer! Ya know, to explain some stuff. But no! He had to just disappear, all dramatic like, in a cloud of freaking pyreflies! If he was standing here right now I'd slap him. Yep! I'd smack him so hard he'd be seeing shoopufs for weeks!

Too bad I'll never get the chance to set him straight and yell at him for being a big meanie by leaving without a proper goodbye. Well, I'm stuck here in lovely reality and he's off somewhere in the Farplane. It's not fair, but, then again, when has life ever been fair?

Some people might tell me that I just have to let him go and get over him. Trust me, folks, I wish I could. If I could snap my fingers and revert back to my life before Big Red, I would do it in a heartbeat. But that's never gonna happen, so I've gotta learn to deal. And if that means I have to plaster a smile on my face and pretend that I enjoy breathing, then I'll do it. I'm not giving up hope completely, but I'm not staring at the door, waiting for him to come back. Nope, I'm gonna get on with my life. And who knows, maybe there's a few more bad guys out there just _waiting_ to be defeated.

I guess my life will always be different since I met him, but I'm not going to let it change who I am. So I better put on my cheerful little smile, cause it's time to go be with everyone. Oh, and I'll make sure that they don't notice anything off about my behavior. They won't know how much I miss him. No, all they'll see is little happy ole me.


End file.
